Almost Gay
My penis has at times been a cause of stress and anxiety. Moments of embarrassment visit my minds-eye, usually at bedtime hile I lay waiting for sleep. Images compel me to make weird noises and convulse violently as a means to distract my thoughts from unwanted memories.
Now I stand nervous in an elevator, ascending to the 11th floor, for an encounter, that I’m sure will become another reason to flush red on its recall.
A door ajar. She beckoned me inside with a softly spoken “come in!”. Darkness met me as I stepped across the threshold-drawn curtains and dim lighting the reason for it. The dark held her for a moment until my eyes adjusted.. As I moved closer, there was long blonde hair tumbling over bare shoulders. She wore a flowing full length dress- undone, revealing perfect breast curtesy of a talented surgeon. This entire scene felt staged, but as rehearsed as it was-it did its job. I froze for a few seconds and maybe my mouth was a little agape when she approached me and stuck her own mouth on to it.
She led me to the bathroom for a shower, after which I entered her bedroom to find her sitting cross-legged on the side of the bed, free of the clothes she wore not moments ago, and as I stood before her she performed excellent fellatio for a short time, then pulled me down onto the bed for the start of a whole new experience.
Some passionate “necking” ensued before I made my way down her body with cute little kisses to her “special place”, where I was to bury my face into her “Breakfast Bowl”. But it was not to be... proceedings took an unexpected twist. I reached her “business end” to find myself eye to eye with a decent sized, fully erect “Johnson”. In my haste to satisfy needs that morning. It had seemed that I'd failed to read the advert in its entirety.
A thousand thoughts occurred simultaneously, all with prejudice. A decision needed to be made under extreme duress. My heart-rate increasing with ensuing sweats. I’m all too aware of the fact that given the position that we now found ourselves. She would be expecting some reciprocity-re: the fellatio. As she’d be unaware that I was unaware that we had more in common than I knew. My first emotion and tendency was to recoil in horror, quickly get dressed , apologize for the mix up then leave... acceptable behaviour for any straight man! I could maybe own up to my ignorance of her disposition. Then there would follow some awkwardness, a circumstance that I do not do well in,
Ultimately, it would come down to the fact that I’m down $300, and if the truth is to be told. Since her little show in the hallway and the thing that she did with her mouth. My need is greater now than when I first entered this scene... and Penis aside, she’s a stunning-looking woman, (or man). So when all is said and done, the choice was binary.. “Blue Balls” or a novel experience. Suffice to say I chose the latter.
A second decision was still to be made, I’m down “there” looking at “it”. Action was needed! Now, I view myself broadminded, I’m into new experiences, but not ones that involve being fucked in the throat by a beautiful transexual woman. So I kept going south, feigned a foot fetish and sucked her toes instead.
For the remains of that day and the days thereafter, I remained perplexed. For I identify as a “straight man”, who has had sex with another man, that looked very much like a woman. I’m unsure if whether that makes me a little “gay”?
